Apa sih satu hal yang dicari oleh kebanyakan orang di dunia ini? jawabannya cuman satu yaitu kebahagiaan. Kebahagiaan itu sendiri bisa hadir dalam bentuk yang berbeda-beda tergantung bagaimana seseorang itu mempersepsikan kebahagiaan. Buat orang matre kebahagiaan itu artinya duit super banyak yang gatau mau dikemanain sampe akhirnya dipake buat bakar sampah tiap hari. But orang playboy kebahagiaan bisa berarti punya pacar yang jumlahnya sebanyak koloni bakteri TBUD. Buat gw sendiri..? jawabannya banyak. Gw bisa bahagia karena banyak hal. Gw bahagia karena punya temen-temen gokil yang lucu2 abis dan siap hedon setiap saat. Gw bahagia karena dibeliin barang-barang elektronik yang canggih. Gw bahagia karena ujian gw dapet A+. Is it? Am I Happy because of those things? The answer is not really.. sure i’m happy because i have them.. but not happy “happy”

Gw selalu beranggapan kalo kebahagiaan itu berasosiasi dengan perasaan yang complete dan whole. Sepanjang 20 tahun hidup gw.. gw belum merasakan hal itu sama sekali. Gamau dibilang gak bersyukur, i appreciate those “happy” times! Mungkin juga ada alasan kenapa gw belum sampe ke definisi kebahagiaan itu dan alasan itu cuman Tuhan yang tau.

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Holaaa again, (akhirnya nulis lagi).. well pada kali ini gatau kenapa mutusin buat nulis my chilhood times.. dan mungkin postnya bakal agak lompat2 atau sangat random but please bear with me haha..

25 mei 1990, pada tanggal inilah gw dinyatakan bernafas di rumah sakit husada dan diberi nama Denis eng ing eng

and so my life starts in my first home…

rumah pertama gw itu di daerah jakarta pusat, di gang subur nomor 12 buntu (kalo ga salah inget, sekarang udah rata sama tanah keknya wkwkwk), yep di rumah 2 lantai yang dindingnya udah abis jadi kanvas corat-coret kreativitas gw (which may contributes to my absurd and cynical creativity) yang juga jadi tempat gw seneng, sedih selama 10 tahun (krg lebih). well rumahnya walaupun kecil dan sederhana tapi selalu jadi tempat gw bermain dan belajar! To be honest, masa kecil gw sangat-sangat sheltered.. gw ga boleh keluar rumah main sama anak tetangga (walaupun sekitar 8 atau 9 taun akhirnya gw boleh mulai main sama tetangga).. karena emang linkungan sekitar rumah ga aman buat anak kecil main2 sendirian gtu deh… drug dealer, thief, yeah something2 like that. Jadi gw sangat2 introvert dan pemalu… Di rumahpun biasanya gw kerjanya nonton hahaha, acara yang biasa ditonton sih film kartun gtu, robot-robotan, sama film layar lebar gtu deh… gw ga suka film india (walaupun nenek gw suka dan gw selalu berantem sama nenek gw berebutan tv =..=, culun sih but i kinda miss those times now… grandma Rest In Peace, Love Ya!). Dan one fact that maybe some of you will be surprised: I used to get scared from watching Horror Movies (apalagi susanna) hahaha padahal skrg ini gw sangat sangat sangat suka nonton film horror wkwkwk..

Random facts #1: My First VCD experience was Bambi (1942)

basically my home is my life, walaupun jujur agak menyedihkan mungkin, selain nonton gw biasanya main dan gw paling suka main robot-robotan yang bisa dirakit-rakit gtu haha menurut bokap nih: gw mainnya kasar dan ga bisa jaga barang Bukti:mainan gw selalu rusak di sana-sini and i end up bugging my dad to buy glue to fix it hahaha, selain robot-robotan gw juga suka gunting-gunting tokoh komik atau apapun yang bergambar dari koran, majalah, bobo, dll. Dari semua guntingan tokoh2 gtu gw mainin dalam suatu cerita yang saat itu terbersit di otak gw (sign of creativity?). Kalo gw udah main: NOBODY CAN STOP ME dan gw paling ga suka diganggu hahahaha.

Random facts #2: When i am 5 or 6 years old, i had slippers that shaped like a bunny hohoho

Oke, skrg ngebahas bakat artistik gw coret-coret tembok… menurut Nyokap: gw sangat suka hal yang berwarna-warni kek krayon, pensil warna dan tanpa babibu langsung menorehkannya ke dinding rumah sampai akhirnya dinding ruang tamu gw penuh dengan graffiti tanpa arti hasil perbuatan egomaniak gw akan hal-hal berwarna… pernah dikasi buku tapi tetep ajaloh gw nyoretin tembok… sampe tiap kali tamu dateng mungkin agak ilfeel gtu ya tapi bokap nyokap ga pernah sekalipun nyalahin gw.. hehe…

Random facts #3: My 1st favourite song is: Aqua – Barbie Girl (1996)

Pas masih kecil gw masih tidur sekamar sekeluarga! yep ini karena masalah keterbatasan ruangan juga sih hehe dan gw tidurnya brutal mgkn kalo disamping gw ada anak kecil juga kalo tidur bareng besoknya mungkin harus ICU akibat tendangan kung fu gw hahaha dan pas tidur gtu di samping gw adalah nyokap so sorrry mom hahaha dan kalo udah masuk kamar tidur gw paling takut kalo harus ke WC… zzz

Random facts #4: Gw punya guling yang kepalanya bentuk beruang gtu

-To be continued-

 

 

Hellooww, it’s me again.. i know its been a very very long time since the last time i posted here, but right now i’m literally trying to write again ahahah so.. here it goes..

 

Pada kesempatan ini mau cerita2 dikit nih tentang hal-hal yang ada di kepala saya

pertama: i have a really weird mind pattern

yes it took years and months to realize this… why? kenapa gw bisa berasumsi begini? well to be honest i’m a very analytical and imaginative person, too analytical i must say.. sometimes i speculate too much (and over-imagining things too). well the good things is some people may find it funny and some maybe not too much (with over-the-top jokes) hahaha

second: i’m socially awkward!

i’m totally an awkward person with new people ,some may find me boring, don’t talk much because i’m better than you BUT it’a actually not true.. i’m just too shy.. really! and e  gw berusaha mengurangi ini semua sih..  tapi tetep aja at some point i still couldn’t control it…

ketiga: ga semua orang yang keliatan baik itu baik

ini sih mungkin lumayan basi kali ya? ahaha i just wanna tell you guys, to be careful out there and be selective to whom you think your friend and whom you think you cant trust! percaya deh lumayan banyak loh orang yang akting kayak orang baik2 padahal dalemnya? “rotten like pungent cheese!” well gw sih ga bilang kalo gw paling baik at least i’m tryin’ to better

keempat: oversarcastic and still not buying those love thingy

yup saya ini oversarkastik loh, kadang bingung juga darimana sih ini semua berasal.. mgkn sebagian personaliti perfeksionis ikut berperan kali ya? well idk hahaha

 

and for the closure… the most shocking facts of all facts….. is… IM GETTING LAZIER AND LAZIER!~!! HELP ME (while strugling to get my head focused to finish my reports), well thats all for now.. i know this post is kinda lame ahahaha well its better than nothing ahaha

UWOW udah lama ga nulis blog rasanya.. hehe maklum lagi merasa males nulis… tapi biarlah yang berlalu (backsound Badai Pasti Berlalu ala Berliana Hutahuruk) tetap berlalu hahaha

anywayy my daily life seems kinda flat now, my mind is relaxed (which is a good thing, @4th term: i’m hectic, @3rd term: i’m crazy, @2nd term: i’m hectic + crazy, @ 1st term: i’m careless), so its a big improvement i guess lol (sometimes i’m still crazy though, depend on the situation wkwkwk)

Tapi oh tapi (penting banget ga sih oh-nya??) ternyata di semester 5, ada satu momok yang menghantui yaitu… lazinessss!!! yup, in this term i feel like a big fat piggy! tugas males, lab males, kuliah males hadeeuuu (maafkan anakmu papa dan mama).. and i don’t think it will get better hahahaha (i hope my GPA won’t go all the way down…)

But of course more than anything, i have to be grateful for everything that i have right now hoho, athough life may sometimes be boring.. but enough with the somber writing nyehehe…well i guess this post is so gaje hahahaha but it’s okay i just want to stop by and well.. write something hahaha..

Car is parked, bags are packed, but what kind of heart doesn’t look back
At the comfortable glow from the porch, the one I will still call yours?
All those words came undone and now I’m not the only one
Facing the ghosts that decide if the fire inside still burns

All I have, all I need, he’s the air I would kill to breathe
Holds my love in his hands, still I’m searching for something
Out of breath, I am left hoping someday I’ll breathe again
I’ll breathe again

Open up next to you and my secrets become your truth
And the distance between that was sheltering me comes in full view
Hang my head, break my heart built from all I have torn apart
And my burden to bear is a love I can’t carry anymore

All I have, all I need, he’s the air I would kill to breathe
Holds my love in his hands, still I’m searching for something

Out of breath, I am left hoping someday I’ll breathe again

It hurts to be here
I only wanted love from you
It hurts to be here
What am I gonna do?

All I have, all I need, he’s the air I would kill to breathe
Holds my love in his hands, still I’m searching
All I have, all I need, he’s the air I would kill to breathe
Holds my love in his hands, still I’m searching for something
Out of breath, I am left hoping someday I’ll breathe again
I’ll breathe again

To be honest, ia actually want to write about the camping times for the past few days, but something get a hold of me (read: maless), so rather than to try to write the stories “half assedly”, i think i could work on another post hoho..

Right now i have just finished my second year! woohoo dan di tahun kedua ini gw dapet banyak banget, BANGET hal yang menjadikan gw pribadi yang tentunya lebih baik daripada sebelumnya (atau malah buruk?? well i can’t judge myself hahaha), but enough about the past times, now let’s talk about the Future, yes! read my lips F-U-T-U-R-E

Kalo gw boleh berangan tinggi sampe keluar stratosfer hingga menuju galaksi tetangga andromeda hal-hal yang ingin gw lakukan adalah sebagai berikut (maap bukan maksud mendahului Tuhan dan sesumbar hehe..):

-I Want to graduate ASAP, 3.5 tahun kalo bisa (AMIIIN), dengan asumsi membantu orang tua, cepat mencari uang (SMOGA)

-Works in some elite or good company, please not some crappy ones… dengan asumsi dapet gaji yang layak untuk membiayai gaya hidup gw yang sangat BBD

-S2!!! mau banget nih, kalo bisa yang luar negeri pgnnya Amerika tapi kalo gak Eropa kalo gak bisa juga Asia juga gpp kalo gak bisa lagi ya udahlah Indo juga jadi =) about what major i’m still kinda confused about it ahahaha yang pasti mau berhubungan sama Biologi.. (Microbiology or Virology perhaps..? well Who knows hahaha)

-Has my own apartment with HDTV, PS3, Microwave, AC, PC,etc etc Ok that’s kinda too much, but i’ll work my ass off to get those things (please don’t interpret these sentences literally.. i’m not going to work using my ass… )

-Has my own car, mau yang agak kecil aja jadi ga rempong dan ribet haha

-Make my parents happy just like they make me^^

-Start a family..? Probably, maybe, indifinetly,idk at this moment it’s still seems so far haha, but we’ll see later!

But in the end, semuanya kembali ke tangan Tuhan, manusia cuma bisa berencana tapi semuanya terjadi atas kehendak Tuhan, tapi bukan ga mungkin semua hal di atas bisa terwujud hehe, for those who read this: have you plan your FUTURE? apa gw terlalu FREAK ya udah berpikir sampai sejauh ini hahaha.. anywayy way way wey woy i think i’m going to end this post with a beautiful song that i loved very very much, enjoy and have a good day 😉

Okay, everybodeeeehhh sekarang lagi masa2nya libur dan seharusnya masa2 aktif saya menulis di blog khukhukhu tapi karena banyak kesibukan di luar bidang akademik jadi untuk sementara update blognya agak ditunda dluuu (#masangtampangsengadansombong)

What actually inside my head right now??

“Realization of a plan is actually more difficult than i’ve ever thought”

ya eyalahh (gaya fitria tropica) nenek salto pake satu kaki sambil ngupas apel di udara juga tauu hahahaha tapi tetep yang namanya manusia (cari alasan haha) selalu begitu dan skrg ini gw lagi masa strugling2nya (bener gak tulisannya, lagi malas ngecek kosakata wkwkwkwk).. pengen santai tapi juga gamau gagal… T^T, mau berhasil tapi gamau usaha (mimpi kali yee.. mimpi aja bisa gagal kek di inception..), bottomline is i really need morale booster, energy booster, and money booster ehm spirit booster i mean, wkwkwk okayy guys, gals just wait for my new post! like wiseman say “patience is virtua”

As a farewell gift:

i think its original melody is called Gymnopedie No.1 by erik satie (a guitarist if i’m not mistaken)

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that’s playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don’t lie!

Opening Credits:Whitney Houston-One Moment In Time (wiwiwiwi lagu olimpiade nih keknya, bole juga buat pembukaan hahahahahahah)
Waking Up:Joe Hisaishi-Love theme of Taewangsashingi (wowww kenapa bangun tidur udah lagu piano romantis gini =__=, it’s so not meee, love is like on number 496 in my list)
First Day:Yasunori Mitsuda-Melody Go Round (Bole bole, nih lagu bikin hati tenang, teduh, dan syahdu berasa di padang rumput diterangi matahari musim panas ahahahaha (okeee OTT)
Falling In Love:Bole di-skip aja?? agagagaga, Hayley Westenra-I Have A love, hmmm no comment dah kalo cinta-cintaan ngacir ajah (love is so not in the air right now, for me though)
Fight Song:Charice-Reset, 0.O berantem? sama sape weeeyy, tapi ni lagu keknya ttg berantem sama pacar d ahahahaha
Prom:JoJo-Beautiful Distraction, I’m crashin’ into cars, I’m runnin’ into trees, i do these things because your love affecting me, can’t control my reaction what a beautiful distraction~ (jadi nyanyi sendiri khukhukhu)
Life’s OK:Allison Krauss-Stay, ini lagunya keknya ttg nyariin temen d, Oke hidup gw akan OK selama gw mencari teman terus, logika aneh tapi boljug and a bit true i guess
Mental Breakdown:JoJo-Fearless, OKE karena gw lagi Depresi jadi gw ga takut apa2, ciaatssss (sambil lari menerjang badai dan ombak pantai)
Driving:Anoop Dessai-Goodbye, wiwwwwwww boleh nih kalo nyetir malem2 di jalan tol, cocok lagunya hahahahaha, sambil buka2 kaca mobil menikmati semilir angin malam dan tinggal tunggu ditilang polisi hahaha
Flashback:Mariah Carey-I Stay In Love, weeeeewwww kaga deh hahahaha
Getting Back Together:Allison Krauss-When You Say Nothing At All, hahahaha jadi kalo udah balikan si pacar disuruh diam ahahahahaha, ‘you say it best when you say nothing at all’
Birth of Child:UWWOOOOW nih pas banget nih Celine Dion-Miracle
Wedding:Sara Bareilles-Gravity, kok agak sedih sih lagunya kesannya menikah terpaksa..
Final Battle:One Republic-Secrets, weee berantem lagi wee, jgn berantem weee
Death Scene:Beyonce-Halo, Ga cocok deh keknya ahahahaha
Funeral Song:Brian Crain-Earth, dr tanah kembali ke tanah, cocok nih sama instrumental pianonya..
End Credits:Celine Dion-When I need You, ‘just close my eyes and i’m right beside you…’

Okay, tomorrow is the Final Exam! Wish me lots of luck!

Hello-O everybody, we’re enterin may now yeayyy, 21 more days to my birthday! i hope my parents planning some gifts for me NYAHAHAHAHAHA, anyway.. i want to tell u about my current status:

-currently listening to: Stan Walker, Glee Soundtrack (esp. A house is not a home by kurt  and Borderline/Open your heart), JoJo,ALPHABEAT (Diggin’ the spell s-o much ARGHHH can’t get enough of the songs)!!!

-Sick =( (the cough won’t go away and i still don’t think that i got TBC, maybe it’s just need more time to heal miehehehe, believe me coughing is really tiring and make your voice sound funny sometimes)

-Finished Mid-term (Yeayyyy, i hope that my score won’t be too bad… Can i get an Amen? AMEN)

-Broke (yup, i really need personal accountant, money consultant or whatever the F it is to help me maintain my money, SOS!)

-Relaxed (have finished several issues about private matters, feel better and i’m so ready to start my day with full of smile =D)

-Busy T-o the max (4 labs, presentation, paper, assignments, quizzes, etc…  you name it, i got it)

-Rejected the student exchange program to Flinders (i have my reasons and it’s too long to explained here ;D)

-Considering some future plans (academic and professional life)

yup i think that’s pretty much, nyahahaha not much huh?

Well for a farewell gift here’s one of the classic songs ( i once sang this song when i was junior high school for music subject i think), by the way I Love Andrea Ross ;D